Little Johnny One Question

[Phil Lawton]

OK, picture the scene; you're in Bristol's Asda Wal-Mart, just after putting some frozen frog embryos (in a dolphin sauce) into your shopping basket, when you spy Liz Fraser browsing through the chilled panda steak section. She looks in the mood for a question - just one question, mind, and not a long one at that.

What would you ask?

RULES

Must be answerable.

MUST - and I can't stress this one enough - be brief and concise. Any replies to this that constitute a paragraph will be deleted...I'm not joking. As a guide, you must be able to verbally deliver your question in reality with one normal breath and without the aid of a) a ten second build-up, b) an aqualung or c) PCPs.

My question? Given the theoretical meeting place, that she is adored by many and largely unrecognised among the unwashed masses, bearing in mind that she hasn't released anything of note since 1997, would be:

"Excuse me, Liz...do you know where they keep the tinned monkey brains?"

You know the parameters, you crazy bunch of goat-fondlers. Let me see you do your worst.

Phil

P.S. Just before someone points out that my question may contravene my own rule of being answerable, Liz could, indeed, answer this. The alternatives could be "No...and are you that toss-pot who keeps slagging me off on Leesa's site?" or "Yes...they're just down aisle 34 next to the potted silver-back....and are you that toss-pot who keeps slagging me off on Leesa's site?" See?

[Phil Lawton]

Oh, rules addendum:

No touching.

No kissing.

No groping.

No weeping/sobbing.

Any post with "I love your work" or "Would you marry/sleep with me?" as part of the question will be deleted....again, I'm not kidding.

[someotherian]

"haven't we done this topic already?" .. is my question.. to you..

[Phil Lawton]

Nope...we did a "If you met Liz, what would you say?" topic, which produced the novel-esque gushings I'm trying to avoid.

I'm just curious as to what people would say in a VERY short question to gain maximum benefit.

Care to try, Monsieur Brown? Or are you.............chicken?

[iceblink]

My question would be: "How's it goin?" OR "Do you give singing lessons?" ballerina

[etc etc]

"Liz, do you think a cumin aioli would go well with the panda steak or would you prefer a mango chutney?"

[santeras]

"What in god's name is a pearlydewdrops drops????"

"EH?"

Oh wait, that's two questions.... er...

"Wanna come back to mine and listen to my 75's?"

or

"Do you agree with the London congestion charge?"

I'll get my coat...


John.

:D

[mmmender]

"liz babe, what's with the bug eyes?" :eek:

[glint]

I'd ask her how she likes her frog embryos, "unboned" or "crunchy"...

[zed]

..............umm.....are those contacts?

or.........not wearing a bra? cold innit?

:cool: zed.

[mattadore]

"So... when is the long-rumored solo LP gonna come out, Liz?"

[Phil Lawton]

You see, children? It can be done, although Senor Santeras sailed desperately close to the wind at one point. 'Twas only my complete bafflement regarding his reference to his "75s" that allowed his post to stand.

[mmmender]

Originally posted by mattyboyo1
"So... when is the long-rumored solo LP gonna come out, Liz?"

matty, you've just hit a nerve, it's the twitchiest one phil's got...it's a leftover from the war. he doesn't like to talk about it. :rolleyes:

[someotherian]

Originally posted by zed
not wearing a bra?
or "why are you wearing a bra?"

[mattadore]

Originally posted by mmmender


matty, you've just hit a nerve, it's the twitchiest one phil's got...it's a leftover from the war. he doesn't like to talk about it. :rolleyes:

Ut-oh... sounds serious... :eek:

[REPLICESS]

I'd simply say:

"Hello Elizabeth, how are you?"

Boring, but risk-free....... I think !

[Your ring]

Tell me, Liz, for the last time: do you love me or not?:(

[spanglemaker]

how many fingers am I holding up?pimp

[mmmender]

liz......

(1) why is phil so cynical?
(2) how much did you pay for those shoes?
(3) what's it like having sex with robin guthrie?
(4) just how tall are you anyway?
(5) how does peter gabriel look up close?
(6) does damon reece snore?
(7) bottled or tap water?
(8) was dr. seus a big influence?
(9) who's left for you to collaborate with that would excite you?
(10) coke or pepsi?
(11) last book you read?
(12) exactly how much change have you got in your pocket?
(13) what cd have you got on constant rotation at the mo'?
(14) was luci a good baby? how about lily?
(15) don't you hate it when people call you 'hon'? i do.

[someotherian]

Originally posted by spanglemaker
how many fingers am I holding up?pimp
i can answer that one on her behalf: "five, ten, fifty(fold)"
(i'm assuming a weakness in anatomical knowledge on liz's part.. ;) )

p.s. it's funny when you quote from spangle's comment cos it says "how many fingers am I holding up? p.i.m.p " (without the dots of course).
sounds like a line from a clint eastwood movie! :)

[Lucibelle]

Now, I know this is a soft spot. Especially for Phil, but I sincerely WOULD like to ask (although I might not ever find the nerve)

"So, you think there might ever be a chance of a reunion?"

If I truly could not find the nerve to ask that, (one never knows until faced with that situation) I might simply ask,

"So, how are you these days?"